"Maybe that's what life is... a wink of the eye and winking stars"  -jack kerouac

tried to find what is important and found this instead:
ask:
what do i want
what must i do to have it
how would i feel when i have it 
so, what i really want is to feel -
i am part of something / feel like i belong somewhere in this world 

you wont let me

dealbreaker ||rachael yamagata 

susan sontag

-do stuff

be clenched, curious

not waiting for inspiration's shove

or society's kiss on your forehead

-pay attention

it's all about paying attenion

attention is vitality

it connects you with others

it makes you eager

-stay eager 

"There's only one thing that I know how to do well, and I've often been told that you only can do what you know how to do well, and that's be you. Be what you're like. Be like yourself."
They Might Be Giants "Whistling in the Dark"

somebody that i used to know -gotye

Instructions for Life

These statements were falsely attributed to the Dalai Lama in an email hoax. They actually derive from advice in Life's Little Instruction Book: 511 suggestions, observations, and reminders on how to live a happy and rewarding life (1991) by H. Jackson Brown, Jr; More information is available on the hoax at Snopes.com

1. Take into account that great love and great achievements involve great risk.
2. When you lose, don't lose the lesson.
3. Follow the three Rs: Respect for self, Respect for others and Responsibility for all your actions.
4. Remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a wonderful stroke of luck.
5. Learn the rules so you know how to break them properly.
6. Don't let a little dispute injure a great friendship.
7. When you realize you've made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it.
8. Spend some time alone every day.
9. Open your arms to change, but don't let go of your values.
10. Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer.
11. Live a good, honorable life. Then when you get older and think back, you'll be able to enjoy it a second time.
12. In disagreements with loved ones, deal only with the current situation. Don't bring up the past.
13. Share your knowledge. It's a way to achieve immortality.
14. Be gentle with the earth.
15. Once a year, go someplace you've never been before.
16. Remember that the best relationship is one in which your love for each other exceeds your need for each other.
17. Judge your success by what you had to give up in order to get it.
18. Approach love and cooking with reckless abandon.

the cursor stopped after i typed -tell me 

so tell me 

what can you tell me 

tell me why i feel like crying 

tell me why i feel what i feel now

tell me

just say it 

will you?